Tag Archives: Sex

Sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

31 Jan

Challenge question of the Day . . . “Your last kiss.”

See–that’s kinda too vague for people whose minds think like mine!

Does this refer to the date, time, and place of my last kiss?

Who the last kiss was with?

What I was thinking during said last kiss? The possibilities are endless! But I’ll tackle it anyway.

So … lemme tell you a story!

I haven’t been kissed in a while. Whispers, “really it’s been MONTHS (see: almost a year) True facts, people! Sad but true!

And it . . . left A LOT to be desired!

I had friends in town visiting, right! And over this particular weekend there was way more alcohol consumed than there was food.

Really, a lot of it is still a blur! And it was my proverbial, “I’m too old for this shit!” moment. I haven’t done that again, and have no desire to, either.

Anyway, on this “weekend” for some reason I was feeling a little good about myself. (You know those times) … I flirted it up, wore cute little outfits. Swam in a pool (or at least pretended to because I don’t know how to swim. DON’T JUDGE ME!) and . . . yeah. It felt like I was young and on Spring Break all over again.

The drinks were a flowing, the guys were a guying, and I (Lolo) felt like I was on top of my game.

Enter guy # 1 *sigh* Yup! I spent almost all day flirting with a downright cutie patutie. He had potential, girls! And really, he was gonna get it!

But then *gasp* enter THE VILLIAN of the story!

Okay, maybe he wasn’t a ‘villain’ per se … but it’s my story!

This guy (ugh) definitely shouldn’t have went there with him again. AT ALL! But he had something over our cutie patutie! Yes, yes–the villain and I  had history!!

I felt more comfortable taking things . . . elsewhere . . . with someone who I’d been, uh . . . elsewhere with before! Catch my drift?

It was terrible! On all fronts and such a big mistake. I never saw cutie patutie again after the weekend… (Though I could if I wanted to because we have mutual friends) and I sure as shit, stayed the hell away from villain afterward.

So . . . yeah, my last kiss—my last TWO kisses, were on the same day!

I should be ashamed of myself.

I’m not. 😀

When was YOUR last kiss?



Penis Envy

12 Jun

“Forgive me father, for I have sinned”

As,  I’m days late with posting,  and the theme of my life continues to be sloth… Today’s sin of the day is: Envy

To be more specific . . . I’m taking it one step further to . . .  Penis Envy

Now, I’m not talking about Freud’s disturbing theory about when a young girl starts having a sexual desire for her father, and resentment towards her mother and all that, ’cause . . .  NO! Just . . .  NO! *shudder*

What I AM talking about however, is that moment, somewhere around your mid 20’s when we woman realize,  that we do in fact,  lack a penis.  

And the privilege’s that come with it.  

I’m sure this all started way before my time, but since I wasn’t alive during the “Woman’s Lib Movement” . . . I’ll take you back to the early 2000’s. 

Before the kids these days had “Kim Kardashian” as role model, and sex tapes were a sure fire way to hit stardom.

I had Lil’ Kim, Christina Aguilera, and the likes, singing in my ear that , as women,  “It was time to make a change,  and stand our ground against double standards”  and to literally  “SHOUT OUT LOUD!!” ‘Cause ‘Can’t no body hold us down.’ Yada, Yada, Yada . . .

And you know what I did? Wait for it,  I BELIEVED THEM! 

Yes,  like many of you ladies out there,  in my early 20’s I ran around, with the belief that I to can do what the big boys did, and shouldn’t be judged for it. HAHAHAHA!!!!! *slapping my knee*  Oh my poor naive soul!!! 

Do I still believe I shouldn’t be judged for all the sloring I did when I was 20. Absolutely.  Is that how it works, however? NOPE!!! 

And deny it all you want, but we know it’s true!

Where a man can get a way with MURDER in the dating-sphere . . . We woman can’t!

It sucks, but it is what it is!

I CRINGE at some of the people I’ve let (for lack of a better word) enter my sacred temple in the past, people that I wouldn’t so much as chance a second glance at, now that I got my “I am woman hear my roar” head, out of my ass . . .

So, yeah. . . even though I’ve gotten lucky, and to my knowledge,   DON’T get judged for certain things from my past, I still have to live with it! Whereas (in my opinion) I really don’t think guys have that same issue as often! Hence the penis Envy!

Thanks for reading and sorry so short! I plan to elaborate on this in the future! But I wanted to write something really quickly and dedicate it to one of my best’s Meli!!! 

Lustful Writing

6 Jun

Consider this Part 2: of  “My eyes are lustful whores”

The sin of the day is clearly still: Lust

OK! So you know how I told you that lust is one of the topics that I could write several posts about? I wasn’t kidding 🙂

Many of you know I write (or maybe not)… What you may not know, however, is WHAT I write. Fanfiction! I know– Don’t judge me! I love what I write, the stories I read, and some of the amazing authors that I meet daily… So yeah, my motto: Don’t like it don’t read it ya know! No hard feelings!

Moving on!

I decided (since we’re still on lust) to share with you some of what I write… that pertains to lust that is. Yes, my stories have a plot… of course! But, they also have some smut! So, read with caution!! Under 18: please leave now! Thanks!


He grabbed the back of my knees and started thrusting into me more forcefully then he was before. 



“Fuck… Yes!”

The sounds of our moans and grunts filled the air.

The noise of our hips slapping together echoed in the night.

I pulled his hair.

He bit onto my shoulder.

His movements were rough, hard, and needy.

They were almost angry.

 And it was fucking fantastic.

When I felt my walls clenching around him, I whimpered.

“Shit,” He hissed, and started rubbing my clit furiously; so furious that it probably would hurt if I wasn’t so wet. “Come on baby…” He pleaded… his eyes scrunched tight.

Once he takes my earlobe into his mouth I explode.

I’m shaking.

I’m screaming.

I’m coming so hard I’ve lost control of my body.

He’s still slamming into me brutally.

I don’t understand the noises coming from me as I all but beg him to stop.

I can’t take it anymore.

The pleasure is so intense I almost cry.

And then… I feel it… I’m there again.

“Yes…” He growls. “Gimme another one baby…”

And I do.

He’s grunting and moaning how much he loves me. Then finally I feel him spill into me.

We’re spent, and barely holding on too each other, as I finally feel a tear escape.

 “What was that?” I asked breathless, and panting once we calmed down.

He takes a moment as if trying to find a way to explain, when an evil glint came to his eyes. “That my love…” He smiles smugly.  “Is what I like to call make up sex.”


He he! Hope you liked it! Ever want to read more? Here’s how to find me!

On AO3

On Fanfiction.net

at The Writers Coffee Shop- TWCS 

OR: If you look at the top of the page… I also add my stories here on my blog! 😉

I’ll share another one with you guys! If you’d like! Lemme know!!! 🙂

Once a Cheater– Always a Cheater?

27 May

… Sometimes, I’m not so sure that’s true.

Now, before I begin, let me state that I’ve never cheated on anyone. I have, however, been cheated on and cheated with. There’s no other way to describe that feeling, other than it hurts like a MOTHER! I wouldn’t wish that gutted feeling on my worst enemy. So, I am in no way out to make excuses for anyone. In any way, shape or form. Got it? Good! Moving on! 

For a story that I’m working on —which deals with a past event that some might consider cheating—I found myself stuck on how to make my character proceed with her relationship. 

Her boyfriend, or in this case fiance’, doesn’t cheat per say, but he does do something that he shouldn’t have. That’s all imma say.

Anyway, my initial reaction was to make her furious. She left, stopped speaking to him, attempted to move on, etc. Months went by before she even entertained the thought of speaking to him. Let alone reconciling with him.

When I sent a rough draft of it to two of my pre-readers, they both sent it back to me with the same concern.

“Don’t you think you have her overreacting a little bit?”

“Of course not!” Was my first reaction. This, of course, is with me not having re-read it with those thoughts in mind. But regardless I stood firm. 

For about 5 minutes. 

Than I realized, “Holy… she IS overreacting. This is totally unrealistic, and no one, in real life would react so drastically.”

Or would we?

Like I said I said, I’ve been on both sides of that cheating spectrum. Having been the naive girlfriend, and the chick on the side. Cars have been keyed, prank calls and idle threats have been made. Fights were won and lost. I’ve done and reacted in many ways that I’m not proud of. But at the time, felt justified. 

I look back on my younger self sometimes and want to shake myself shouting “WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?”

The same, as I imagine, a lot of the knuckleheads that broke my heart, look back and think, “Wow,  I was terrible.” 

See where I’m going with this? Not yet? Okay…

Back to the question: WHEN is a cheater always a cheater? 

Yes, if your of a “certain age” and still cheating and carrying on about, do I think this rule applies to you? Absolutely!

But when you’re young and growing up etc. do you guys think it applies?

Do you always look back on someone’s past “behavior” in a relationship and let it dictate how you think they will be with you? 

If you find out he/she cheated on their last boyfriend/girlfriend– Do you automatically assume they will do the same to you? Or does this only apply if this happened WHILE you guys were together? 

Lolo: Phone Sex Operator

25 May

Has a ring to it doesn’t it?

OK… So, maybe that was a little bit of false advertisement. I’m not a Phone sex operator or “Phone Actress” as I’ve found they prefer to be called.

How do I know what they prefer to be called you wonder?Why I’ve researched it of course!

Recently—meaning a couple days ago— I was having a conversation with a new friend of mine about my budding unemployment.

As I was discussing my growing frustration and disappointment, about not finding a job…  she said (well IM’ed) to me:

“You should be a phone sex operator!”

I had to pause for a second.

Not because I was offended, or taken off guard, but mostly because I had a “Why the hell haven’t I though of that?” moment.

Now, no little girl grows up saying “I want to be a phone actress” but I venture to guess that little girls don’t often say “I want to be in my late twenties, and back home living with my parents” either. Right? I’m desperate here folks!

But anyway, back to my research.

For starters, other than my trusty pal Google, I had no idea HOW I was going to find out about such jobs. I also had my doubts that these jobs still exist. What with all the free porn sites, and webcam sites and stuff you know? But meh… I still looked it up!

Turns out finding info wasn’t that hard and “Phone actress” jobs are all the rage.

From college students to stay at home moms, there were hundreds to thousands of articles, books, and site dedicated to “How to be successful”—“Things to say/avoid”—“How to make the most money”— “How to still sound sexy while folding your laundry”– Really the list goes on.

There were also a list of sites dedicated to just that. Such as  SexyJobs.com — LipService.net — ChatRecruit.com. —PhoneSex.yuku.com and more.

But alas dear friends, through all the research I found, I realized that I can never be a phone sex operator because I forgot two important things… one I’m really not a dirty talk kind of girl. Now I can read it, and I sure as hell write it in my stories 😉 but that actual saying it *cue awkwardness* but that’s not that most important set back. Still want to know what that is:


Now I’m sure I have… at one point in my life… But I honestly can’t remember the who’s, what’s, when’s, where’s, and how’s… So there’s a good chance my memory isn’t failing me and that I indeed have never partaking in telecommunication intercourse. <— See what I did there? I tried to show I’m smart AND awkward! Did it work?


I’m DYING to know what you guys think about this ‘profession’… Know anyone who’s been a “Phone actress”… Know a “friend” who’s called, or calls on a regular basis? Ever considered, for yourself giving it a go for some extra income? I need some advice here folks!

Don’t worry—I won’t tell 😉

You Know Times are Rough when The Porn Shop Doesn’t Call you Back!

2 May

Like many other people out there right now, I’m unemployed. Not just any kind of unemployed either. No- I’m talking about the ‘all pickiness is out the window and despite having gone to college, flipping burgers sounds appealing’ type of unemployed.

Hell, just yesterday I was entertaining the idea of mowing my neighbors’ lawn for a quick buck. Yeah see… NOT picky!

You have to understand. I’ve been working on and off since I was 14… So being out of work for over a year because of my SSNA (read more about that on my post- Me and my arthritis…5 things I learned)… Has been pure torture!

Add to that, me being back home and having to stare at the walls of the room I grew up in AND having to do it broke? Well it’s no surprise that the days I’m feeling homicidal are more often then not.

So when I found out that the local adult video store was hiring I JUMPED at the chance.

1. Because I felt the job would be a no brainer. (It was a clerk position and all I would have to do was ring people up) but also

2. I figured I could probably get some employees discounts on… Well let’s not go there.

The ad said they were hiring, and looking to fill the position immediately and not to call, email etc. but to COME APPLY IN PERSON!

Well this is what I’ve been looking for, I thought to myself. If I can go in and apply, and dazzle them with my sheer awesomeness, I’ll at least get an interview. And well once I get an interview the job is as good as mine! (Cheers for confidence).

This is of course after, not ONE, not TWO but at least THREE lectures, talks with my mother about how she doesn’t like the idea and how I’ll get disrespected and blah blah blah.

I had to bite my tongue AND the inside of my cheeks in an effort not to inform her, that nothing someone could say to me at an adult video and toy store, could beat the things I use to say my damn self or be said to when I worked at a strip club, a few years back. (I was a bartender and a waitress. I’d thank you to keep your minds out of the gutter.) Lol.

Moving right along.

Where was I…? Oh yes, so I go in and apply. I have a lovely chat with the big burly tattooed guy that was there. Played it up, put on my smile on my face (that he actually commented on) and walked out of there with my head held high, at least expecting a call back for an interview!

Then waited.

And waited.

And checked to see what was going on.

And waited some more.

AND NOTHING! NOTHING! No call back, no interview and sure as hell NO JOB! Grrr!! I’m sure my mother felt smugger then shit about that, but whatever.

I mean, I’m not saying I was the PERFECT candidate for the position but would the chance to at least talk it out and wow them with my knowledge (or lack thereof) of vibrators have killed them?

Ah well (shrugs) maybe it was for the best. After all this gives me more time to concentrate on my writing right?

But wish me luck anyway! I’m currently waiting for a call from the local cemetery; true story!

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